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"Unlike Christians, Santorum and his fellow Roman Catholics participate in a barbaric ritual dating back two millennia, a 'mass' in which a black-robed cleric casts a spell over some bread and wine, transfiguring it into the actual living flesh and blood of their Christ.
Followers then line up to eat the Jesus meat and drink his holy blood in a cannibalistic reverie not often seen outside Cinemax.
Roman Catholics like Santorum take their orders from 'the Pope,' a high priest who, they believe, chats with God. Santorum has made no secret of his plans to implement his leader's dicta on allowed uses of vaginas and anuses, but has said little about what additional dogma he will be compelled to obey.
Will child killers and terrorists go unexecuted on the Pope's say-so? Will we be able to conduct our wars as we see fit, or only the 'just' ones? If Santorum is a good Catholic, and he appears to be among the very best, our real president with be Benedict XVI (a 'former' Nazi, by the way)."
Larry Doyle, HuffingtonPost's (haha) Comedy Section. . . . Read More