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My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire . . .
I noticed your cat.
Sorry! |
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Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it,
She moved in with me. |
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Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder,
"What the hell was I thinking?" |
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Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband. |
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How could two people as beautiful as you,
Have such an ugly baby? |
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I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love . . .
After having met you. |
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I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you. |
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As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am . . .
That you're not here to ruin it for me. |
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Congratulations on your promotion.
However, before you go . . .
Why not take this knife out of my back?
You'll surely need it again. |
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Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike! |
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When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise. |
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We have been friends for a very long time . . .
Let's say we stop? |
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I'm so miserable without you,
it's almost like you're here. |
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Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was? |
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