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Reasons Not To Mess With A Child
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A little girl: was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale
to swallow a human because even though it was a very large
mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not
swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will
ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
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A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children
while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around
to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently,
she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what
God looks like."
Without missing a beat or looking up from her drawing, the
little girl replied, "They will in a minute"
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A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments
with her five- and six-year olds. After explaining the commandment
to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she
asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how
to treat our brothers and sisters?"
One little boy answered, "Thou
shall not kill."
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One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother
do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed
that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking
out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why
are some of your hairs white, Mom?
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you
do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my
hairs turns white.
"The little girl thought about this revelation
for a while and then said, "Momma, how come all
of grandma's hairs are white?"
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The children had all been photographed, and the teacher
was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group
picture."Just think how nice it will be to look
at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer,
she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor."
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And
there's the teacher, She's dead. "
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A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the
blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now,
class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would
run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright
in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't
empty."
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The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic
elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was
a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:"Take
only one. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of
the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want.
God is watching the apples."
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Source: E-mail
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