Men are Just Happier People


- If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

- If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.


- When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

- When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.


- A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

- A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.


- A man has six items in his bathroom:  toothbrush and toothpaste,
shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .

- The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.


- A woman has the last word in  any argument.

- Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


- A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

- A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.


- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

- A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


- A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

- A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.


- A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the
trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

- A man will dress up for weddings and  funerals.


a.. Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

b.. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.


- Ah, children.  A woman knows all about her children.  She knows
about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods,
secret fears, and hopes and dreams.

- A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.


A married man should forget his mistakes.  There's no use in two people
remembering the same thing!




"Freedom is Knowledge"